2.05.2010

I'm Available for Hire


It's been awhile since I posted anything about Nash, and he is changing everyday.

He talks in full sentences now and loves to sing.
He knows his ABCs and can count to 13!
He likes to sit on the potty, but has yet to actually "go."
Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, I Am a Child of God, Baptism, and My Eternal Family are some of his favorite songs and he knows all the words.

Because I am clearly such an amazing mom, I thought I'd offer a special 2-year old training camp for those of you who are interested in impressing your friends too. Your *tuition will include (but is not limited to), the following:

1) Lots and lots of Cheerios (many varieties will be offered)
2) Gum and/or candy (only if it gives me any additional peace)
3) One hour of Sesame Street (commercial free)
4) One additional hour of Elmo's World (commercial free)
5) One half hour of Dinosaur Train (very educational--they even learn that all dinosaurs poop)
6) One story (most likely Nash's favorites, Up, Up, Up, Pinkalicious(?), or Moo Baa La La La
7) One full uninterrupted hour of alone time in the playroom
8) 10 minutes of singing time in the car
9) One essential 2 hour nap so I can prepare for the rest of the day by blogging

The *tuition is worth the amount of quality TV time your child will receive. Plus, I need some help paying for the luxury of Direct TV--how else am I going to tape all these shows? Please contact me when you're ready to begin. I know you want to. Hurry, spots will fill up quickly.

*Tuition is based on how much "training" your child will need. It's not easy getting 2-year olds to watch hours and hours of TV, but the results are worth it.








Anyhow--back to Nash--one of my favorite things he's done lately is when I tell him "no" and threaten to put him in his crib, he'll say, "Time out!" I've rarely even used the phrase time out with him, so it made me laugh when he came up with that one.

Nash has also started calling me "Paige". I just answer to him, like it's completely normal. He usually gives me a "Hey Paige!" Pretty courteous I think...



Signing off.

8 comments:

paige said...

Absolutely Celeste. Ty said you mentioned Nash's potty training couldn't come soon enough. I completely agree!!! Could you maybe start working on that when your're here on Mondays? Thx.(Just watch Elmo's potty time if you need any pointers).

hOLLIANN said...

That is hilarious, and not to take away from your fabulous plan...but I woo the neighbors and fellow wardies by teaching my kids the "Fab 5"...you know, the 5 answers to every church question ever asked. Let me know if you want further information...I can get you the short list in a jiffy!

btw - my word is frapoo...weird!

[Morgan] said...

if you'll take an almost 3 year old, i'm in.

Erin said...

I can relate to so much of this it's not even funny!

Laura said...

SSSWWWEEET! Sign ME up! I could use some help with the complete sentences stuff...and I can't get Harrison to count to 5 let alone 13! I will have to take notes and can you send me the times of those shows :)!!! LOVe ya!

emily said...

He's a cutie! I thought my friend was asking about my blog headers and then realized it was you! To answer your question...yes, I used some digital scrapbooking stuff and made it in Photoshop! :) I can help you if you want!

Erin said...

As soon as you include dancing with the occasional jazz hands in your curriculum...I'm signing right up.

hOLLIANN said...

Reg wanted to know if I could attend?